Thirteen Little Blue Envelopes

When Ginny receives thirteen little blue envelopes and instructions to buy a plane ticket to London, she knows something exciting is going to happen. What Ginny doesn't know is that she will have the adventure of her life and it will change her in more ways than one. Life and love are waiting for her across the Atlantic, and the thirteen little blue envelopes are the key to finding them in this funny, romantic, heartbreaking novel.

So, I did not finish this book.  Technically, this is because I forgot it at the gym and most likely will not have it back till Tuesday.  But the fact is, I was already considering DNF-ing this.  It is really not a terrible book, it just did not hold my interest in any way.

I wanted to like this book.  I liked The Name of the Star, many of my friends had enjoyed it, and the premise itself just seemed very cute and quirky.  Plus, there is MJ herself to consider.  She is the perfect combination of awesome and eccentric, so I decided that this book would just as awesome and eccentric.

Unfortunately, it forgot the awesome and kept the eccentric.

The idea sounds cute, in a pitch.  Quirky, but cute, and not completely illogical.  That's before you're told that Ginny is not allowed to bring a cellphone, a laptop, a camera, or any sort of guide/translation books, and her parents are not allowed to give her backup money.  I'm sorry, but what sane parents would allow their teenage child to traipse about Europe with no immediate way of contacting them and no backup whatsoever should her dead aunt not come through?  Oh, and not only are these envelopes from her dead aunt, they are from her dead aunt that up and left with absolutely no notice several years ago, who is known for being crazy and erratic, and who died of a brain tumor.  I'm sorry for the abundance of italics, but I am trying to emphasize just how completely and utterly unbelievable this is.

Unfortunately, that was not my biggest problem.  While I certainly would've been side-eyeing it for a bit there, if this novel had pulled through with great writing, awesome characters, and smooth plotting, I could've dealt with it.  I could've even enjoyed it.  But sadly, it did not.  The worst thing about this novel, for me, is that it was completely and utterly meh.

Ginny was meh.  Over a hundred pages in and I still had not gotten the slightest hint of a personality from her.  I didn't dislike her--she wasn't a bitch, and while she was a bit on the slow side, she wasn't a complete idiot- but I found it impossible to be emotionally invested in a robot.

The romance was meh.  There wasn't the slightest hint of chemistry between the two of them.  After seeing Keith perform for the first time (and not thinking of anything feelings-related) Ginny writes in her notebook (?) to her best friend, Miriam, who has not been mentioned once up to this point, and talks about how she thinks she may have a crush on him.  Erm . . . ?

The writing, as well, was meh. It wasn't bad, and there were a couple good lines or parts that made me smile, but it was far too clunky and plain to carry the plot.  Also, while I do realize that a plot like this calls for more description than the usual (after all, Ginny is a tourist) this was bogged down by so many descriptions that I soon found myself skimming large passages.

Finally, the plot just seemed all over the place.  It was just so . . . nonsensical.  There didn't seem to be a common thread carrying the story line.  Things that you'd think should be big and important are glossed over. Boring and insignificant occurrences abound.  There are several cases where something will be mentioned, or Ginny will spend several pages preoccupied by something, and then this ends up being completely irrelevant to the plot.

As I said, this book was not terrible, but I had absolutely no investment in it.  If you're a big fan of MJ, or Europe, or eccentric aunts, then you very well may enjoy it, but it's not a book I would recommend.

2 stars.

All These Things I've Done

In 2083, chocolate and coffee are illegal, paper is hard to find, water is carefully rationed, and New York City is rife with crime and poverty. And yet, for Anya Balanchine, the sixteen-year-old daughter of the city's most notorious (and dead) crime boss, life is fairly routine. It consists of going to school, taking care of her siblings and her dying grandmother, trying to avoid falling in love with the new assistant D.A.'s son, and avoiding her loser ex-boyfriend. That is until her ex is accidently poisoned by the chocolate her family manufactures and the police think she's to blame. Suddenly, Anya finds herself thrust unwillingly into the spotlight--at school, in the news, and most importantly, within her mafia family.

Engrossing and suspenseful, All These Things I've Done is an utterly unique, unputdownable read that blends both the familiar and the fantastic.

This is the first book I've given up on in a long time.

And some might think it strange. Because, looking at it objectively . . . is it better than Twilight? Is it better than Evermore? Is it better than Hush, Hush?

I think I'd have to say yes to all of those.  But the difference is, however terrible those books may be, the one thing they did do is keep me interested.  They kept me invested enough in the story that I wanted to know how it all turned out.  And that just did not happen with All These Things I've Done.

There are a few main reasons why I gave this up.

1. The writing.  It wasn't horrid writing, and there were a few moments when it shone, but the style really did not work for me.  From what I've gathered, it's Anya writing this whole account. I've read several books that worked that angle wonderfully. This did not.  The writing was awkward and distant, and the random interjections only annoyed me.  Also, little dialogue gems such as this didn't really help my opinion of this:

"His name's Goodwin but he goes by Win.  Isn't that OMG?"

Uhhh, yeah.

2. The characters. I didn't hate the main character, Anya. I really didn't. There were a few moments where I even liked her.  But most of the time, I just felt so removed from everything that was happening, and couldn't bring myself to care.  Also, certain characters (coughScarletandNattycough) annoyed the hell out of me.  They were flat, simple, and irritating, which is all the worse because I'm pretty certain we're supposed to love them. Win, the love interest, was . . . okay. He didn't upset me, but there was just no spark.  I felt no chemistry between him and Anya and couldn't understand why he was interested in her.  She hardly encouraged him.

3. The strong Christian presence.  This part is just my bias.  I tend to dislike books that have a strong religious presence, regardless of what the religion is.  Some Christians may absolutely love this aspect of the book. It just really didn't work for me.

4. Related to the last one: Anya being the "good Christian girl."  Whenever she would think bad thoughts, it would be all No, no, I can't think these things, because I am a good Christian girl.  Whenever the possibility of sex was presented to her it would be all No, no, I would never have sex, because I am a good Christian girl.  Now don't get me wrong--I have no problem with those who choose not to think "bad thoughts" about others, or who choose to abstain until marriage.  That's there prerogative.  What upset me was that these were painted as bad things, like being pure-minded and abstaining made you a saint and daring to think bad thoughts about someone who almost date-raped you or, gasp, having sex before marriage made you a terrible person.

This is not a horrible book.  This is really one of those cases where I just have to say that it was not for me.  Some of you may love it, or at least like it a lot more than  I did.  (Plus, you might just want that gorgeous cover. SO PRETTY.  And did I mention that the hard cover is patterned to look like chocolate?)  But personally, I could not make myself finish this.  

2 stars.